that stupid birthday cake

Thought I’d reblog this on Mr. Welles’ 100th birthday.

row away from the rocks

Part of this year's twenty. Geez, I'm getting old.

” ‘That stupid birthday cake,’ she said, ‘is just another cake; and you’ll have all the cakes you want. But the candles are a fairy ring. And you will never again in your whole life have just that number to blow out.’ ” ~Beatrice Welles, on her deathbed, to her son Orson on his ninth birthday.

The book Orson Welles: The Road to Xanadu, Volume 1 (by Simon Callow) is like a treasure box. Each time I open it, I find another gem of a glimpse into Welles’ childhood. Welles states that the greatest mistake he made was that night. He forgot to make a wish before he blew his candles out. 4 days later Beatrice died at Chicago Memorial Hospital in 1924.

If a feature film is ever made of his life, it would be a crime to omit his mother’s influence. She wanted…

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Bootsy Bansfield Reporting

Bootsy Bansfield, the intrepid TV reporter, is out for the shock of her life when she steps into the crowd of animal rights protesters.

“What’s that lipstick on your face?” asks one angry picketer holding a sign that reads MAC IS MURDER!.

“Um, I don’t know, Blissful Ignorance I think?

“Exactly!”

Bootsy asks for a Kleenex from her cameraman. As she tries to wipe her lips, they go live while protesters loot a salon and whip cosmetics at Bansfield.

“Here we are at Boppin Betty Boop’s, the salon that not only admits to but advertises animal testing,” reports Bootsy. “Oh look! PETA is burning the poster of bunnies and chimps wearing mascara. Ouch! STOP THAT!”

Bootsy just got hit with a mega plastic cosmetic kit. She picks it up and studies it. “Okay, c’mon people! Fifty Shades of Grey Eye Shadow really hurts! Back to you at the studio!”